I chatted with my mom this afternoon. On parent conference days, when my kids have no school the kids that are school age get to go to Grandma's house for a special visit. In the early years, I mostly appreciated the cheap and convenient babysitting. Now that they are older, however, I am more appreciative that my mom is taking the time to get to know the kids (and all their lumps and bumps), and they are building wonderful relationships.
So tomorrow Mom is taking my 5 year-old nephew, my 11 year-old daughter, and my 14 year-old son to the Air and Space Museum. When informed of the plan my 14 year-old groaned, "Mom," accompanied by a healthy (and message-laden) pause. Then, "Do I have to go?"
What a conundrum - although it shouldn't be - I sympathize with him - he wants some time that is just his - unstructured, preferably in his room. However, he spends plenty of time in his room, reading and playing those dastardly little electronic games. A change of routine will be good for him. Besides, it is the right thing to do.
So, I prepped my mom on the phone. "Mom, listen, I hope that he isn't too surly. He wasn't very enthusiastic, so I hope he won't be too much trouble. You know, he seems to be going through this phase..."
"Ellen," she interrupted quickly, "I have had plenty of experience with surly teenagers, if you'll remember. We'll be fine."
Relief washed over me. It is true that in raising five children Mom gained lots of experience with teenagers...she was a master at getting us to do what she wanted us to do - and helping us keep a positive attitude about it. Now that I think about it, she had teenagers in the house for almost 20 years. Mom deserves a medal for putting up with all of us during those years. She's right - they'll be fine.
I hope, some day down the road, my kids are able to look back on these days spent with their grandmother, exploring the Smithsonian Museums, eating at McDonalds, and watching movies, the way that I remember my time with my grandmother: precious.
Put Up Your Dukes
11 hours ago
You are so lucky to have your mom nearby to be a part of your kids' lives. That was never an option for me. Lucky grandma too.
ReplyDeleteParenting teens is such a yo-yo ride, isn't it? In some ways, I've found it much more challenging than dealing with toddler tantrums! One of my colleagues at school keeps telling me to hang in, that it will get better (my son is almost 19) -- then in the next breath, finishes with: "Well, Jeremy is 23, and still as much a baby as he was when he was 3!" Her laughter tells me I have miles to go before I sleep! haha
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