Saturday, March 20, 2021

It's all about the timing...

When I opened my eyes this morning the sun shone brightly into the room. This was not dawn, this was the light of high noon.  March 20, the Spring Equinox, announced itself joyfully.  Spring is definitely in the air - despite the frozen birdbath and fish pond in the backyard this morning.  Strings of little green buds hang veil-like around the willow tree, while the Forsythia bush explodes bright yellow and the fuzzy buds on the Bradford Pear tree burst open.  The tiny wild Violets are spreading their green across the lawn, and a multi-bird chorus accompanies the story unfolding before my eyes. 

So, I took down the Christmas lights - seemed like the thing to do.  

 

Friday, March 19, 2021

Things To Do This Weekend

Things to do this weekend - Stream of consciousness: 

-I need to do my laundry - and now that includes dry cleaning...I haven't taken anything to the dry cleaners for over a year.  

-I need to take care of my closet - full disclosure, about 51 weeks ago I anticipated many free hours (I'm not sure why) and I unloaded my closet onto the bed in the guest room.  I have picked up the occasional outfit to take back to my closet, but for the most part, all of the clothes are still there.  Boo.  

-I need to make my week of lunches - the only thing between me and a hearty Popeye's Chicken Sandwich (and the increased chance of a heart attack) is the salad that I pre-package and grab as I walk out the door each day.  Willpower = nonexistent.  

-I need to contemplate and then collaborate with the hubs around what our plans will be for Spring Break - it's only 1 week away!  I should stay home and take care of the aforementioned closet, but...Spring Break!

-I need to put more books on hold from the Library.  I love this ritual.  I was so relieved when the library started allowing us to pick up books we had put on hold during the pandemic.  This has been a lifesaver for my sanity and my wallet.  

-I need to make a doctor's appointment.  Ugh.  Why are these so difficult to make?  Could it be that I'm concerned about the gentle remonstration I may receive for the extra 20 pounds, lack of exercise, and general poor self-care?  Yes, I know...I will.  

-I need to take some time to visit my parents and my aunt now that we all have been vaccinated.  We are the only ones in the family who can hang out!  I want to sit with them, and visit with them, and enjoy them, and celebrate with them. 

That's a pretty full list - I think I'll stop there.  If I get 3 of these things done, I'll be happy.  Have a good weekend!  


Thursday, March 18, 2021

Stand-up, Anyone?

Today I had to acknowledge to seventh and eighth graders that the school day that they returned to doesn't feel normal - and it won't this year.  Because it was raining, we brought our kids into the auditorium for their "recess" time.  I beckoned the kids down to the front and then into the rows (separated by multiple seats and rows each).  As I walked to the front to grab the mic, the silence was deafening.  They knew to expect the desk shields, the social distancing, the hand sanitizer at every entrance; but, the reality of it was hitting them - and they had only been here for two classes.  

The eighth-graders, especially, expressed a loss of the unique freedom that they have lived with for the last 12 months.  For these guys - on the cusp of independence - coming to school was feeling very much like steps backward, and they didn't like it.  

Meanwhile, at each of our six recess periods, the kids stared at me...with trust, with suspicion, with curiosity, with doubt.  Oh, I'm in trouble. I'm going to have to up my entertainment game - because, me asking trivia questions to 50 kids in the auditorium, and tossing packages of Swedish fish at them for prizes, will lose its appeal quickly!  Let's hope Spring comes gently, and soon!  

Stand-up, anyone?  

Wednesday, March 17, 2021

How's Your Stress?

Occasionally my husband and I watch a show while we are eating dinner.  In fact, we have a repertoire of shows that we watch that help distract from the day's work, including shows like The Mandalorian, Somebody Feed Phil, and Enterprise.  However, we just finished an episode of the Greatest British Baking Show (Italian Week) and I am distracted AND completely stressed out!  How am I going to sleep after watching that?  Tonight there were injuries, high temperatures, and devastating outcomes.  

I'd love more details about how this show actually works.  Matt and I observed that the contestants are often wearing the same clothes, leaving us to hypothesize that they are working on multiple challenges over the course of the day, and they all seem very familiar, even comfortable as if they have spent an extended period of time together.  

The other interesting thing is that we have heard Judge Paul ask contestants if they practiced the type of baking as they are discussing what the plan is for their dish.  Practice?  I pretty much thought these guys walked in off the street to do the contest.  Having said that - there are a few of the contestants that seem very calm and collected (professional perhaps) while others are a total disaster.  

Tonight Yan got eliminated - her pastries didn't laminate the way they should have.  I can't believe it. I'm devastated for her. (I now know what laminating means, in baking at least, by the way).  

And yet, her concession was so lovely - "I loved every minute," she said to Judge Pru.  

How for real is this show? And, who is the retired 80's rocker who announces who is going home?   

  


Monday, March 15, 2021

Food, Glorious Food...

Religiously, on Sundays when the kids were in elementary school (and before I quit trying to send them to school with a healthy lunch), I would put an assembly line together to make a week's worth of bagged lunches. With one or two little helpers, I spread out the 20 pieces of bread, slathered peanut butter and jelly, and squished the two slices together - or we might branch out to sliced ham and swiss with a quick swipe of butter (neither child would touch mayo or mustard!). The favored job, though, was bagging the cookies and Cheezits. There would often be an argument about who got to help with those tasks - and obviously lots of nibbling occurred. 

Packing lunches is in my history - for many years my sisters and I packed our lunches to take to school. One of the memories that I relish (and enjoy embellishing) is packing lunch for my sister and me when we were in middle school. We lived in Germany during those fateful years (7th, 8th, and 9th grade for me (she was a year younger)) and my sibs and I rotated jobs to help out the family. There were five of us kids (with 13 years between us) and my mom had her hands full. We had different chores assigned - making the milk (yep, mixing up the powdered milk in a 2 quart container (it's not bad if it's cold)), making the salad for the family dinner, bathing the little ones, and making lunches for the three of us in school. My sister and I would lay out that wonderful German brown bread (long and oval-shaped), smear it with peanut butter and Nutella, and we'd be good; although to get it to fit in a plastic sandwich bag took some creative cutting. I do recollect it being pretty dry to bite in to...perhaps my memory is faulty. :) 

I've begun packing lunches again - for myself. I've found that if I don't take a lunch with me, I'm apt to eat any snack food that I can put my hands on - or, I've learned a Popeyes chicken sandwich can be delivered for a small price...which, when I'm hungry I'm willing to pay. 

So, Sundays, again, find me in the kitchen, this time chopping romaine lettuce into bite-sized chunks and doling it into 5 plastic containers. Next, I determine the veges I am going to load onto the lettuce - this week I added chopped cucumber, diced tomatoes, and sliced beets. Finally, I've figured out that there must be something protein-oriented (as well as some fiber) so this week I mixed Black-eyed Peas and diced ham with garlic and celery and a little oil and vinegar - and ta-da - a salad topping. 

I probably should have begun this post by admitting that I am not a cook - I don't create anything with food. But, I do find pleasure and reward in implementing this assembly line of lunch creation that will serve to sustain me (and/or various family members) for the week. And, wow, the salads taste pretty darn good!

Sunday, March 14, 2021

If You Feed Them...They Will Come

Many years ago, in our first home, we installed a bird feeder which we loaded with Black Oil Sunflower Seeds in the hope of drawing beautiful birds throughout the year.  Unfortunately, for months we fed the neighborhood squirrels, despite my husband's ingenious squirrel-proofing; and of course, the squirrels called their friends, and then they called their friends, and in frustration, we took the bird feeder down.  Many years and one move later, we are ready to try again.  We have had incredible success growing Purple Coneflowers in our yard, and we both enjoy watching the Finches gather to peck at the seeds embedded in the center of the flower, so we have decided to focus on feeding the finches.  

Now, a bright yellow feeder hangs off the fence in our backyard - perfectly positioned so I can watch in the morning from my comfy kitchen chair, and later in the day, my husband can watch from the home office.  The feeder holds about 3 pounds of Nyjer seeds - a seed popular with the Finch family and not popular with the squirrels.  

This morning, a cup of coffee in hand and wrapped in my warm robe, I watched the birdfeeder and the little chirpers that it drew.  Red-headed House Finches, more subdued female Finches, and occasionally the light-yellow head of a Gold Finch all stopped by to nibble - and an apparent pecking order began to emerge.  The larger red-headed House Finch stayed primarily on the bottom of the feeder, generally wallowing in the black seeds and flicking them over the sides.  The daintier Gold Finches grasped the wire mesh and pecked at the seeds, twitching their tail feathers for balance when the wind caused the feeder to sway.    

They were a pleasure to watch, and honestly, there was something calming about being able to observe nature so closely without disturbing it.  The squirrels that use our back fence as a trans-neighborhood highway - didn't even blink at the birdfeeder.  Apparently, Nyjer seeds just don't appeal.  

Saturday, March 13, 2021

An Annual Tradition

 Every year around this time in the Slice of Life Challenge, I have written about participating in the annual job fair here in our district.  Today, I participated again - but it was completely virtual - and it was almost more fun than in person.  

The enthusiasm of the candidates was still palpable - their faces reflected their enthusiasm for teaching and supporting young people.  Even the candidate whose camera wouldn't turn on conveyed her passion for ensuring that all young people had a solid and strong start on their life's journey through her voice and her responses.  

The Superintendent did a wonderful job rallying the team - reminding us that the work of hiring is perhaps the most important part of ensuring student success.  

I even loved getting dressed for these interviews...suit jacket and blouse on the top, jeans and slippers on the bottom!  

Who's the wiser?  Just me.  :)

Friday, March 12, 2021

Put on Hold

 And so, it has been 

one year since the fateful 

announcement that our schools were 

closing down and our lives

put on hold. 

A few weeks, 

we thought; an extended spring break, 

we thought; could it be a lark, 

we thought?  

It wasn't.  

It was 52 weeks, 

without hugs, 

without family gatherings, 

without in-person connections. 

Weeks of fear, 

loss, 

and social isolation. 

Weeks of masks, 

stoicism, 

and video connections.

We move forward with hope,

and yet, reflect on what we've lost.    


Wednesday, March 10, 2021

Exhilaration to Exhaustion

 I am still awake, despite a strong urge to curl up in bed and fall asleep;  a pre-arranged Facetime call from my college senior is helping me stay awake.  We haven't chatted in a while - She's busy!  

She's reached that stage of her college experience where she swings from exhilaration to exhaustion, from adventure-seeker to return-home-body.  She's excited about getting a job in something, but not really ready to settle down. 

So, she's calling tonight to give us the details about her plans after graduation! She's given us some hints - she really wants to spend time in a Spanish-speaking country - so she's headed to Spain.  

So proud of her successes - and can't wait to see what she does next.  

Tuesday, March 9, 2021

What's your Clifton Strength?

For those of you following...we made it through the first day - and there was joy!  The kids were tentative but excited, cautious but open. And the black skirt and boots helped me feel great.  

Packing up my office, sunset still an hour away, I was pumped!  We made it through day one - and it was positive.  I was ready for more.  I hopped into my little car, threw it into reverse, and slammed into the recycling dumpster that is awkwardly placed in one of our parking lots.  

Really?  My baby blue, my Zippy, my electric guilt-free accelerator?  Damaged.  And I realized, at that moment when you do something you really wish that you hadn't, that I had been running, running, running, and I needed to slow down.  

Sometimes a wake-me-up is a good thing.  Sadly, my wake-me-up came today.  My dad called tonight to remind me that these things happen, look on the bright side, no one was hurt - and besides, he has an excellent collision consultant that he has worked with...pretty sure I might get a deal.  Thanks, Dad! That really made me feel better.   

His call and my hubby's support nourished my greatest strength - optimism.  In fact, it is my Clifton Strengthfinders #1 trait - so, I'll get a good night sleep, and wake up tomorrow ready to face the world again.  

And tomorrow I'll call the collision consultant.  

Monday, March 8, 2021

First Day of School Jitters...Really?

I have the first-day-of-school jitters. Hard to believe when it's March, but the first group of kiddos comes into the building tomorrow.  And what a first day it will be, masked and socially distanced, wielding electronic thermometers at foreheads and verifying student's health with a green check!  

These guys have never been in our building - in fact, no students have ever been in our very-close-to-finished building.  Almost every single teacher has moved classrooms, so even the seventh and eighth-graders will be hard-pressed to figure out where their teachers' rooms are.  

And, as usual, I'm worried about what I'm going to wear!  I typically wear a suit of some sort, and of course our school colors. Honestly, having worn mostly jeans for the last 11 months, I am sure nothing will fit from my work-clothes closet.  So, a stretchy black skirt it is.  And boots - my black boots - they at least feel kind of dressy, even though they are flat.  I do need flat these days, as when I take one pass on every hallway in the building, I cover 1.4 miles.  

Clothes, protocols, routines, striping down the hallway - stretchy clothes or not - we are so excited to see young people coming back into classrooms!  

Sunday, March 7, 2021

Making the Bed


Snapped by

hands gripping the crisp 

sheets, they billow and fall,

freshly washed, soon to be

Anchored by 

hospital corners learned from my 

mother who learned from 

her mother, a nurse, 

Topped by

overstuffed pillows, enveloped and 

precisely positioned, supporting 

heads, furthering dreams

Blanketed by

a downy comforter aired 

in the winter sun, flung high 

to float and gently rest

Saturday, March 6, 2021

Zoom Fun

I'm late for my writing tonight due to our weekly family Zoom call.  As we continue to deal with this pandemic, and the challenges of staying healthy, teleworking, and isolation, one of the positives for me has been the opportunity to gather as a family via Zoom.  Usually it's my Mom and Dad, and at least a few of my 4 siblings, with the occasional grandchild thrown in.  

When you are part of a very large family, times when you gather in person have a tendency to be chaotic, especially with the number of littles that we have running around.  I might leave a family gathering not having spent much time talking to my mom, dad, or one of my sisters one on one, although we would have spent hours together, shared a delicious meal, and even cleaned the kitchen! I love our family chaos and wouldn't change it at all - but I do treasure this Zoom time, as it allows us to interact differently with each other.  The quirks of Zoom mean that we can't all talk at the same time, and in fact, we have to mute in order to be able to hear.    

This is an important shift in family dynamics, even the quietest family member gets a chance to be seen and heard in this setting.  So lucky that our family is able (and willing) to do this.  

LOVE!

Friday, March 5, 2021

An Escape from the Vicious Cycle of Productivity

By the time I drag myself home on Friday night, like many of you, I'm pretty much done in.  Many people might have a good dinner and toss themselves into bed in order to begin the rejuvenation process.  Not me.  Friday nights are my "me" time...they are free of obligation, and I don't like them to end.  Often I find myself finishing a book and beginning another, or watching multiple episodes of Bridgerton until my eyes are literally closing.  I don't want the exhilaration of a finished week to end, and the expectations of the weekend to begin.  

Tonight I serial watched WandaVision - and it was awesome.  Time, not tracked by productivity - with no accountability.  No judgment.

Free, for this evening.  

Thursday, March 4, 2021

The Never-ending Story

This week the teachers came back to school - and it has been so exciting, truly, to hear other footsteps in the hallways and the murmurs of voices in classrooms.  We have been under construction for the last two years, and throughout this pandemic, I've messaged to our staff that "the silver lining is...our building is almost finished!"  I've even gone so far as to say, "when you return, it should be done!"  

And as teachers entered and explored the building, including the new spaces, it has been gratifying to hear their excitement over the finished classrooms, the freshly painted walls, and the beautiful, unique spaces for us to share.  I groaned, however, at about 8:00 AM on Tuesday when, as teachers were opening their virtual doors to students, the jackhammers began outside our windows.  

They have promised to be done when the kids come back on Tuesday, next.  But, I'm beginning to feel a little like Murphy Brown with her constant painter, Eldin; will we ever be finished?    I do appreciate our team's patience.  We will see.   

Wednesday, March 3, 2021

Mystery Box

As I drove home I did a little mental math - ok, if I was at school at 6:30 AM - and leaving school at 6:30 PM, that means I have worked a 12 hour day.  If I work five 12 hour days, that's a 50 hour week, and that is only counting the time I'm in the building - and not counting pretty much every Saturday that I have opened the school to allow teachers to come in and set up their rooms.  So, as I walked into the kitchen once I did arrive home, I was feeling kind of crabby, and maybe a little sorry for myself.  

I dropped my computer bag and purse on the floor and glanced at the stack of mail the hubby must have dropped on the table earlier.  Perched on the top was an innocuous brown box labeled Literati.  Instantly, my heart leaped - My book of the month is here!  Without taking off my coat or even washing my hands, I grabbed scissors and cautiously cut the packing tape, being careful to not damage the box.  Upon opening, I checked the quote on the inside left cover of the box (it feels like a book, really) - this month the quote was from Stephen King, "Books are a uniquely portable magic," - Brilliant!  But my eyes were drawn to the right side of the box and the elegant black envelope with an "M" embossed on it, hiding the cover of a book.  

Pulling the cards out of the envelope, I had such a sense of being included in something special, unique.  The host of this book club is Malala Yousafzai, yes, Malala.  And, this month she chose for us to read:  Aftershocks, A Memoir, by Nadia Owusu.  I can't wait.

I have to admit, I'm very much a creature of habit and comfort when it comes to my reading.  I have my favorite genres, I am a serial reader - picking up the first, then the second, then the third and fanatically finishing the whole series in a blink.  I love long books that pull you in...and when I'm getting close to the end, I don't really want to finish at all.  

Belonging to this book club, a lovely gift from my sister-in-law, has pushed me out of the routines of reading into exploring other writers and genres.  I haven't participated in any of the online discussion groups yet, but for right now, I'm thrilled to enjoy the anticipation and luxury of a hand-picked book - by a person whom I admire - being delivered to my front door.  What a lift this box gave me today - what a gift!     

Tuesday, March 2, 2021

Recentering...

At the end of a long day, having made hundreds of decisions (some rather large, many around the minutia of the return to school) it is a relief to fall back into the rhythms and routines of home life.  My husband is the cook in our home.  Early on in our marriage, he realized that if wanted to eat anything other than the basics (which often included a Kraft box), he would need to take over the cooking.  Fortunately for us, I was more than happy to do the washing up instead.  This evening, after the Return to School Zoom Town Hall, I took great pleasure in wrapping up my day by washing the dishes and cleaning up the kitchen.  The sheer sense of accomplishment, of clean counters and empty sinks after a day of juggling knives and spinning plates, means that I head to bed now with a sense of resilience and possibility.  

Ready to do it all again.  

 

Monday, March 1, 2021

Protected

Rolling onto my side this rainy morning, my hands gripped the covers pulled tight against my chin, and I squeezed my eyes tighter.  Cocooned by my blankets, not fully awake, I analyzed how I was feeling.  Could I pinpoint a headache?  Any joint pain?  Was I feeling a chill?

Slipping onto my back and unsqueezing my eyes I confirmed, no headache.  The joint pain I was feeling was the normal "your body is 54" joint pain that I have felt every day this year.  The chill?  The gas fireplace in the room hadn't clicked on so the room was a frigid 59 degrees.  

Flipping onto my other side, I became aware of discomfort in my right shoulder, a pain that eased as I moved my arm from under my body. I slowed my breathing and counted my blessings.  This was the minor pain of major protection.  

Grateful.